


The Soldier and the Philosopher

by kitkatz221



Series: The strange and changing life of Emily Harris [1]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies), Sherlock (TV)
Genre: M/M, Multi, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-29
Updated: 2013-07-29
Packaged: 2017-12-21 18:59:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/903729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kitkatz221/pseuds/kitkatz221
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>*Note before you start: it ends happy*</p><p>She was shocked that he was compliant to her request. But she needed to be smart about it; she had been warned he enjoyed games and manipulation. It was a good thing she enjoyed the games as well. This was going to be a true test and now it has officially begun the quest to convince Sherlock Holmes to go home to Baker Street and to Him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Soldier and the Philosopher

**Author's Note:**

> *Note before you start. i only clicked major character death b/c I will prob get yelled at for not...but it ends happy, i promise* ok, continuing on. We're walking we're walking... 
> 
> I own Nothing. :)
> 
> I'm finished with it, just going through beta-ing, but i really wanted to share it. 
> 
> Its still rough bare with me. im working on my thesis and i hate half finished stories. so i thought if i get it out there i can fix it later when i am done with my other enormous writing project (which i am afraid will NEVER end)  
> Plus plot bunnies have started a part two for this world on top of thesis writing. :)

E:

 

She saw him. Finally after 2 hours of being in Bruges she had finally spotted him at a little cafe with yellow umbrellas.

 

"Perfect" she thought. The cafe was packed for a late afternoon tea or coffees, depending on what nation you were from.

 

Her thoughts were focused on why she was there, so much so she did not notice the man following her with the red suitcase. She cautiously approached the man who was focused solely on his laptop.

 

"Excuse me, do you mind if I sit with you? All the other tables are fulland I could use a coffee and snack while I wait for my hotel room to be ready." He looked upand she had a sudden jolt.

 

 _-what was that-_ she thought.

 

Shrugging off the odd feeling she asked the question again only to be interrupted. She was warned this might happen.

 

"Excuse me, do you mi-"

"Yes, I heard you" he replied.

 

 

\--------

S:

 

He was interrupted from writing by an obnoxious tourist.

 _-What did she want?_ -

She wanted to sit at the table with him. He had full intention to be rude and tell her to leave. He looked up and received a shock. She looked so much like him it caught his breath.

 _-How_?-

She asked the question again and before he could stop himself he said "Yes, please sit"

 

\-----

E:

 

She was shocked that he was compliant to her request. But she needed to be smart about it; she had been warned he enjoyed games and manipulation. It was a good thing she enjoyed the games as well. This was going to be a true testand now it has officially begun the quest to convince Sherlock Holmes to go home to Baker Street and to Him.

 

She sat down glad that it was easier than she would have thought. He was striking, handsome in an unusual way. It wasn't the physical features that peaked her interest, it was his eyes. The intelligence had struck her dumb.

 

He was a challenge, someone she could not read.

 

- _This may be more fun than I originally planned-_ she thought.

 

As she settled herself into the chair she dug a French translation book from her bag waiting forwaiter came to take her order.

 

"Yes hi, um..hola..oh wait that's Spanish. parlez-vous anglais?" She struggled a little embarrassed. The waiter shook his head indicating that he did not speak English. Just then the man sitting a crossed from her asked "What do you want?"

"A coffee with milk, and another pot of what you are drinking...for letting me bother you" she showed a quick and timid smile.

 

The man conveyed all this in rapid French. Her knight to save the day she assumed. From everything she learned about him, this act seems out of place. Something the great Sherlock Holmes wouldn't do; another mystery that needs to be solved. She could see in his time away from Him had he become crushed or bitter or broken? Her guess was broken....heartbroken.

 

S:

He noticed her digging in her luggage, looking for something, it was a English to French translation book.

Then little things began to be noticed by the brilliant mind.

 

\- American, Midwest

-First time overseas

\- Single, with a tan line on her left ring finger

-Possibilities-- divorced, broken engagement, broken promises

-supposed to be a romantic trip, became a single trip. Refer to previous Possibilities

\- late 20s

\- came into the country 3 hours ago

 

His skills were a bit rusty without regular use, but they were still better than anyone else. That is why he decided to write a textbook for a criminology class being offered at Oxford as an online class. He was penning this piece of art under a pseudonym as to protect not only his friendsbut his brother who set up the class to begin with. Thinking he needed a challenge in his "retirement”.

He felt frustrated by her not being able to order a cup of coffee, so he ordered for her as well as a new pot of tea for him by her insistence for letting her join him. Was there a social edict for this? He wasn't sure. What should he do?

So instead of doing what he always did, he decided to take a chance; mostly because she reminded him of Him. He wished that his thoughts stopped drifting there, that those memories could be deleted as easily as information like the solar system. Taking a leap of faith without understanding he introduced himself under his Oxford pseudonym.

 

“My name is Arthur C. Doyle "

 

 

"Emily Harris" she replied after he introduced himself.

"Do you live in Bruges or are you visiting?" she found herself asking, even though she already knew the answer.

 

“I live here, have for a while" the man who introduced himself as Arthur said, but she already knew better than that.  He said this but Emily noticed he was not all together present in the moment. He looked as if he was somewhere else.

 

“Could you answer one more question, and then I will leave you alone so you can get back to your writing?" Emily asked.

"Sure" Arthur replied with the sound of wondering if she was going to ask something about his personal life.

“Where would you recommend for dinner?"

 

She noticed his eyes flicker away, - _so...not the question he was expecting..-._ she thought

 

“La Rose is quite good, I would recommend there for your first night in town. Thought you may find places after that will let you down" his response surprised Emily because she knew it to be true. La Rose was quite exceptional, but she nodded and said thank you and began to do her absorptive thing, people watch.

 

 

 

 

He was surprised by her question then the sudden end of the interaction after he answered the question. There was no continuation of the topic like he expected. She just nodded and began to people watch. He caught himself watching her over the next hour, barely doing any typing or edits on his book. She intrigued him, why...and for the love of God why did she make him so sad?

 

Over the next hour Emily people watched. While Arthur went back to his writing, or pretended to write; Emily knew he was watching her. She did her best not to break the silence that had settled upon the table.

 

There were all sorts today in the plaza. This place was unlike anywhere else in Earth. There was a grand government building with golden statues standing high on the roof. Many American tourists were in awe looking up. Emily didn't blame them; such a site could not be found at home. Next to this was a building small and tucked into a corner, almost easy to miss if it wasn't for the line of tourists waiting to enter. This was the Basilica. The first. A one room church that was designated a basilica after a miracle in the early medieval period. There were a few cafes on the perimeter of the plaza, including the one Emily had found Sherlock (or Arthur) at.

 

Unfortunatelythere were also those who were not here for the sites, they were here for the tourists. She noticed a young man asking a middle age man who was obviously a tourist, about his camera and special features while the young man’s accomplice opened the tourists backpack removing some items. Emily thought of going to remedy the situation, but she technically wasn't even here so how would it look if she did the local law enforcements job.

 

Her plan was to wait for him to start talking again, but it had been over an hourand she needed a new pot of coffee. She called the waiter over asked for a refresher and motioned for a new pot of tea as well. “Arthur” didn't look up at the new pot just "harrumphed". Emily wasn't sure how to take that. She told herself she wouldn't interrupt him while working, but she was getting nowhere with him, finally she had had enough.

 

"What are you working on?" Emily asked, finally breaking the silence.

"A book." Arthur replied.

"What type of book?" Replied Emily.

 

He gave her a look of annoyance then it shifted and melted into one that looked as if he was speaking with a child. "The Science of Deduction: an introductory course into Criminology through Evidence and Psychology”

 

"Wow, that is really..um, wow" she replied,. She was shocked to find that this topic was so intriguing that she would take the class the moment it was offered. She knew of course this idea of the great Sherlock Holmes teaching criminology under a pseudonym was purely his brother Mycroft’s' idea to keep Sherlock out of trouble.

"So you’re a Criminologist then. You must be really good at your job to be able to teach how to do it" Emily teased.

 

"I am extremely good at what I do" replied Arthur with a smug look on his face and a glint in his eyes.

 

"Show me." She said with a smile that could and did melt that last brick wall around his heart.

 

\----

 

He knew she would break that silence. But her daring him to show her how good of a detective he was was not something he had any intentions of doing. The she smiled....he was done. How did she, this random girl, have his lopsided smile?

 

"Ok " he said "remember, you asked for this" he said.

She only smiled.

 

He started. "You are left handed, recently popped your shoulder out of place,only child, only you mother is alive, she worries about you. You were supposed to come with your husband, but he called off the wedding very last minute probably the night before to run away with your maid of honor. You prefer bitter to sweet and are very good at your job."

 

Emily's mouth gaped open in shock. She blinked then “how...that was ..wow" then her smile widened. “impressive".

 

It had been a while since he had impressed anyone, it felt good. Then he decided in a split second he needed to stop. It was like an itch that you couldn't stop scratching once started….like that of poison ivy.

 

"Thank you for the tea. I must be going" he stated in a flat tone while placing his laptop into a bag.

 

She stared at him in shock “what? Oh, I thought we were getting along." Her brown eyes looked so sad.

 

_\--no he was leaving, no more reminders.- -_

 

"Wait" please don't go" she said in a soft voice. He reluctantly sat down.

_ \--fine she wants me to stay, but im tired --- _

 

He found himself saying in a stern hard voice. “I’m bored of this.” he seemed to mutter to himself. “How did you find me? And who sent you?"

 

 

\----

 

She knew it was coming. His stature changed mildly. He stood taller as a barely audible whisper struck her ears “I’m bored of this”. He sat and in a frighteningly harsh voice asked “how did you find me? And who sent you?".

 

A shudder ran through Emily as she wondered how long he knew she was playing him. What was she going to do? How angry is this man in front of her? He looked at her very stern waist for her to explain. She sighed.

 

"You are the great Sherlock Holmes, why don't you tell me" Emily said annoyed.

 

The man in front of her started with a sly smile

"You are American, part of some government agency. You are CIA, DOH, NSA, or FBI. You are a field agent, very good at you job. Good enough to play me" he gave a small smirk "at least for a while". “My brother didn't send you because he knows where I am and everyone else thinks I'm a fraud and dead."

 

He looked as if this very fact that he was considered a fraud hurt him.

 

"So who would have the resources to contact you to find me? Not Lestrade...not..”  he stopped mid sentience his eyes drifted down to the table.

 

 

 

 

 

 

His mind was off somewhere else to another time. His memories flooded of those times to Him.

 

"Sherlock, you’re not my friend, you are more" His words whispered in his ear. "Come to bed, I need you" John said as he pulled Sherlock to his feet from the chair. Sherlock had been thinking and non-responsive to John all day. He was thinking of the Jewel heist. How the robbers got in and out without turning the alarm off.

As Sherlock followed John to bed hands intertwined he observed John was smiling.

“Why are you smiling John?"

"Because you listened to me. You came out of your thoughts when you heard me. That's an accomplishment. Who else can say that?" John laughed.

 

Sherlock only smiled, but in his mind he was surprised. It was true. He was so deep siting his mind palace that he should not have heard anything, but there was John’s voice cutting through all that. He smiled wider realizing that he was happy, truly happy without realizing it. That night was full of dizzying passion and caring like he had not felt since the first time they finally admitted those feelings existed.

 

\-----

 

Sherlock came out of his memories a little embarrassed and very sad.

 

Emily was staring at him. Waiting for him to continue in his tirade.

 

\-------

 

"CIA.” was all Emily could say. She saw he was on the verge of crying. Not from anything she said, she knew. Sherlock was remembering happy times, she knew that look. That look was why she was here, looking for a dead man.

 

"I received a phone call three days ago from John. He was crying and screaming and could hardly get a word from him except " Moriarty, I don’t know how, but he is alive I know it.  I received a note saying

 

“ _If you continue your investigation, I will burn you like I burned Him - M_ ”. 

 

“I was on a flight within 2 hours of that phone call” She said

 

To this news Sherlock looked up from his cup of tea in astonishment, but said nothing, waiting for Emily to continue the story. "I pulled some files and checked in a few favors before I left, and after 17 hours of hard searching I had found proof that somehow the idea of Moriarty was alive.”

 

Emily took a drink of coffee and continued. “When I got in, I found John in the flat at the point of having a breakdown. During the time I was on my flight he had tracked down the person he though responsible for the note and assaulted him. Where he was subsequently arrested and released thanks to Detective Inspector Lestrade.”

 

“Mrs. Hudson made us some tea while John explained that he had been calling in his own favors to help him find the person who sent the note.  A contact told him that it was one Anthony Franks and was given his address.  Apparently Johns mind went blankand all he remembers is waking up in a holding cell." 

 

At this time Sherlock could not believe what he was hearing Moriarty alive, John assaulting people. Did the world turn upside down while he was gone and thinking everyone he cared for was safe?

 

Chapter 3:

“You did not answer my first question, how did you find me?” he asked

Emily looked away to the tourists thinking about how much to tell him.  He would be able to tell how much was a lie, so she would tell him a little of the truth, not all of it.

“I have friends in high places who are very god at their jobs.  No, Mycroft did not help me.  He is very protective of you.  He lies to everyone about you.  It doesn’t surprise me in the least.  In fact when I got to London I was “kidnapped” by Mycroft to inform me to stop”

Sherlock scoffed and gave a little smirk that this news of kidnapping.

 

She was picked up at the Heathrow by a woman who “insisted” that Emily go with her.  She was then directly taken to an abandoned warehouse.

“I suppose I should be honored that “The British Government” Is so interested in a little old tourist as myself” Emily directed at a man in an immaculate 3 piece suit leaning on an umbrella

“If you are a “little old tourist”, then I am Her Majesty” Mycroft Holmes responded with a small smirk. 

 _\--Fine, you already know who I am, did He tell Mr. Holmes I was coming?—_ Emily thought to herself.

“Alright, Mr. Holmes, what do you want?”

“Please stop looking into this.  I know John is being taunted, I am working on it.  We do not need your kind of help.  Leave it to me, leave it to us” Mycroft replied.

 _\--“Us”, yah I figured that one out.  The Holmes brothers, always sticking their noses where they don’t belong—_ she thought annoyingly.

“You do realize John called me for a reason, what are you doing to protect him?” Emily strained not to scream.

Mycroft looked down “I am doing what I can without John knowing it. Detective Inspector Lestrade has been invaluable, as well as the CCTV cameras at 221B Baker St.  I monitor him and ask Mrs. Hudson to make sure he eats, not that she needs me to ask.    I also have the group and finances Moriarty built under surveillance as well as any individuals who “drop by” Baker Street looking for John.  That is what I have been doing for him Ms. Harris.  Don’t criticize my ways.“

“Why have you not said anything to John?  He feels alone in this.  He feels alone in finding this madman who is torturing his memory of Sherlock Holmes.  I assume this Detective Inspector Lestrade knows what you do? Or are you just a minor employee with the British Government to him?”

Mycroft only smiled as Emily began to feel annoyed and pissed off at this man standing so proud in front of her.  Not showing remorse or regret for not helping John. She wished she could punch him. 

\-- _I need to go, I need to check on John.  This man is only making me angrier_ —she thought.

“Why are you here Ms. Harris?  I looked you up when I was alerted to the situation.  You are with the CIA, have worked server missions with MI6.  Where did John find you, and how did you end up His most valuable resource?” Mycroft asked with true curiosity. 

She knew he could read or deduce much from her, why was he asking questions she was quite she he already had the answers to?

“I’m on vacation visiting a friend who is heartbroken over the loss of his love, why else would I be here” she replied with a smirk

A pause so thick neither person breathed, there was no sound.

“I owe him, which is all you need to know” Emily replied coolly.

Emily decided this meeting was over, she turned and began to walk toward the cab that brought her “If you don’t mind, I have a vacation to start.  Goodbye Mr. Holmes” she waved her hand without looking back and headed to 221B Baker Street to help John find what he needed most, comfort or revenge.  She wondered which one he would choose, and then she realized in a split second the only course was Revenge.

\---

Emily came out of the memory and relayed most of the conversation she had with Mycroft.  Sherlock seemed a little surprised by that.  Apparently Mycroft had not informed Sherlock of this little visit from a friend.  She noticed Sherlock’s hand shaking. 

_\--was it from rage?—_

 

“How was He?” Sherlock asked almost in a whisper trying to his temper his rage, anger, fear, and sorrow all in a 3 syllable question.

Emily looked away with tears welling in her eyes thinking about the state in which she found John. In a similar whisper “He is broken and lost, but hiding it very well”

 

Chapter 4:

Sherlock could barely contain what he felt.  He knew that this course of action would cause some hurt, but he never really thought about the extent of pain this would cause.  Now he knew. 

Would John ever forgive him if he came back?   
Would John move on before he came back?   
No these thoughts need to be filed away until the entire ring Moriarty made could be taken down.

This woman Emily has told him enough to realize that he needs to go home to Johnbut he needed to know how she had found him and if anyone else who was “a proper genius” could find him.

Turning off all emotions he began his interrogation.

“I assume you did not use CIA resources to track me down.  You used, let’s say, shadier resources. How do I know you didn’t lead Moriarty’s people here to me?” Sherlock said with smugness.

He did not wait for her to answer

“Or you used other resourced that are more official but outside the American government. Either MI6…” he noticed her shift in her chair “so, MI6 helped you.  I thought you said Mycroft did not help you.” 

Emily made a small imperceptible smile, one that he recognized so well.  What was with this woman in front of him?  Then it hit him.

“Quintin….I should have known, but how do you know….CIA, you must have dealt with him and one of his 00’s.  How did you know he was …” Sherlock trailed off.

“I didn’t, but that makes sense.  John received a box of snicker doodles from a “Q. Holmes” the day of the funeral.” Emily said with a small sad smile.  “And I was a little shocked Q agreed to help me so easily. I planned a list of logical reasons for him to have this little side project.”  Emily made a small humorless laugh “Turns out all I had to say was I need to find Sherlock Holmes if he is alive, or find revenge”.

“How did you meet my dear brother?” Sherlock asked.

 

Emily knew she couldn’t hide some facts for long, not from Sherlock, not even if they were national security from multiple countries.  In factSherlock had clearance or she would have told him a lie and expect him to accept it as fact.  But she knew this man would expect nothing but 100% truth from her.  She was his connection to John. She was his connection to his future.  He needed to know everything.  Especially since she knew they would have to leave soon. 

The man with the red suitcase was still at the café along with 3 others that did not fit in as tourists. Maybe it was the horrible attempt to blend in with jeans and loose button up shirts, granted that kind of outfit was not odd, what struck her was the  Walther P99’s hidden on their person that made her a bit nervous.

 

Chapter 5:

She hated dresses.  Why was she picked? Fresh out of the academy but smart and clever, that’s why; but the dress, really? The slit was so high up her thigh she would have to be careful not to show anything plus she couldn’t put her holster on or it would be seen.  She was going to kill him!

“Stop touching your ear” He came up behind her. “And stop fidgeting, you look wonderful”.  They were waiting to go through security to enjoy the party.

James Bond, he was handsome in an older and experienced way.  He had grey hair slightly showing around the ears that made him look dashing.  The tuxedo didn’t hurt either.  

This mission was cooperation between the British Government and The American Government.  Standing in the foyer, just past security, in the American Embassy in Libreville, the capital and largest city of Gabon, in west central Africa; here they were to meet a brilliant hacker who had information about a breach that affected half to the world banking systems.  Shubi was “innocently” trying to “find” extra money in a random bank account and noticed odd coding. Unfortunatelythe brilliant Quartermaster at MI6 caught him in under 3 minutes before he could do any real damage the the unsuspected bank account holder.  He agreed to trade the coding information he found in exchange for protection and a new identity including his dream job at Google in the States.  To accommodate these requests both governments agreed to have representatives escort Shubi to safety. 

Emily was picked for this mission, in the words of her supervisor “we need someone who can think on her feet and could be a stubborn as the agent the Brits are using” She assumed it also helped she was a hacker herself and could verify the information was real. But now that she had meet Mr. Bond she understood.  In the 3 hours she had meet him, he disobeyed direct orders and went off book multiple times. Not to mention speeding and almost killing her.  If that was any indication, she should have brought her gun.

“Now Mr. Bond please understand I appreciate you picking up a dress for me, but did it have to be so revealing?” Emily asked in annoyance.

“You look fine.  Now do you know what our target looks like?” Bond asked with a slight chuckle.  He was enjoying this.  That made Emily more furious with him.

_“Would you two play nice?  Ms. Harris don’t let him ruffle you feathers, he like to flirt and find weaknesses in people_ ” came a soothing voice over the comms.  Bond smiled.

“And how long did it take for Mr. Bond to find yours Q?” Emily asked.  There was silenceand she instantly knew the great Quartermaster of MI6 was blushing.  Bond leaned in to her ear “over a 3 day weekend in my flat” Bond winked and Emily smiled.

“First things first Ms. Harris, call me James. After all we are supposed to be more than associates to these people.” Bond grabbed Emily’s waist and held her close as they entered into the dining room.  Emily smiled “Fine Mr…I mean James, besides friends what else do you want us to show people? You better tell me now. Good friends, lovers, or more?” She replied.

“How about” James paused and looked at the room before them. “Work associates, lovers, and a translator” he said amused. Emily thought back, this was not the original plan, but she had read the files on 007, he didn’t like to stay with a plan.  That was fine by her; you never know the situation until you get there. “Fine” Emily conceded while moving her hand to the ass of the MI6 agent.  James eyes went wide; obviously he had not expected this reaction. Emily only smiled and untangled herself to walk to the open bar, James followed.

“Martini, Shaken, not stirred and an amaretto sour for the lady” James ordered from the bartender. “So have you seen our package yet?”

“Not yet. Q, anything on the cameras?” inquired Emily

“ _No sign of the target. All cameras are being sweptand the minions are doing facial recognition verification.”_ Came the voice again _“I hope you plan to return my agent in one piece Emily”_

“I don’t think you should be the one worried. At least he has a gun if things get exciting, and I only touched his ass once”

“For future record, she doesn’t squeeze as hard as you do, it was nice” James interrupted.

“You will regret saying that when you get home” Emily teased

 _“Oh you have no idea how he will regret that statement.  He will be bruised if he is lucky”_ came the playful response, then the change. _“Minion number 4 had 82% positive ID on the package, to the left by the loo.”_

They both looked over and saw a young man with brown hair looking very nervous.

“I better go get him, I think you may scare him” James said

Emily realized he was probably right; he looked like if a woman went to talk to him, he would faint out of sheer panic. James leftand she sipped her drink while scanning the crowd.  This function was a “small” get together of 200 people to celebrate the birthday of the Ambassadors wife.  There were diplomats from many of the surrounding embassies.  Then there were the bodyguards. Something was not right.

“Q, can you do a facial recognition on the guards by the emergency exits?  Something isn’t right.” Emily whispered while trying to figure out why she had a bad feeling.

 _“SHIT. JAMES GET SHUBI AND EMILY OUT OF THERE NOW_ ” Q said.

“Q what is going on?” James said trying to stay calm but harshness coming through.

 _“The 3 guards on the emergency exits are hit men under a man named Monroe, but he is just an underling in the Moriarty crime ring”_ Q said while the minions in the back were working on a new exit strategy involving helicopters.

By now Emily had caught up with James and the two decided through quick eye movements that the front door would be the fastest and safest. Unfortunatelyone of the hit men, tall dark and ugly realized what was happening and moved to block them.  Emily slowed and fell back while grabbing a steak knife from a nearby table and moved behind the man.  Calmly she slid the knife into his abdomen and caused a commotion where most of the dining hall now had all the attention on the large unconscious man and the woman in tears lying on the floor while she screamed and cried “someone call an ambulance, I don’t know what happened he just collapsed.”  This gave James and the package a change to walk straight out the front door and into the night. Emily met up with them once things became so hectic she slipped out and ran to the exit point.

After they were extracted and made it to London James took Emily to a local pub where there sitting at a booth was a skinny pale man with black curly hair and a crooked smile. “Nice to finally put a face to the voice” Emily said as she sat down. “Thank you by the way for “loosing” the footage of what happened in the embassy, I don’t think my superiors will believe me that their “plan” would work.  They weren’t there, they didn’t see what I did” She picked up her glass and cheered the man in front of her that she noted desperately needed a sandwich.

The waitress came to the table with a large salmon and cucumber sandwich along with crisps for Quinton, a chicken salad sandwich and crisps for James, and a BLT for Emily.  Soon she was back on a plane home preparing herself for a long night of writing her report.

All in allit did not go as planned and Emily got yelled at when she got home.  But on the upside she made 2 new contacts that respected her ability to adjust to the changes that always seemed to happen to this particular MI6 agent and finally got to see the man behind the calm voice in her ear.

 

She kept in contact with James and Quinton over the years helping where she could and vice versa. She was not the same bright new agent when she got the phone call from John, she had been promoted and seen war, so she knew exactly who to call because after all that time she remembered the name Moriarty. She knew he was ruthless, she had seen it.  She wasn’t going to let him get away with breaking Johns heart.

\---

Emily told Sherlock everything. She smiled when she talked about meeting Quinton.  She realized how much they looked alike, especially the hair and the smile.

Sherlock sat there the entire time listening to her tell how she met the famous 007 and his brother. She wasn’t even sure if he was really listening.

 

Chapter 6:

 

She was waiting impatiently for the question that should have come first; The only question that probably mattered to him.  She knew why he hadn’t asked it yet.  To get all background data first before emotions took over.  
\--How do you know John?-

But it didn’t come.  Insteadshe watching him deep in thought with his chin resting on the finger tent she had seen him do in pictures.  He was calculating, planning, deducing.  Did he already know her past, was he just playing her, or was he processing information. 

Emily noticed movement from the man with the red suitcase. 

\--I guess out time is up, no more stories—

Sherlock came out of his thoughts when she “accidentally” spilled her coffee all over the table.

“I am so sorry; I didn’t mean to do that. Excused me waiter” she called rather loudly at the waiter who sauntered over attentively with a rag.   Emily game Sherlock a quick eye flick to the suitcase man, he registered the movement and began to scream at Emily about ruining his computer.

“You idiot you have fried my computer, how could you be so clumsy? I was being nice to you by letting you sit here, then you talk to me insensatelyand you ruin my work” he screamed while putting away his laptop.  By now the entire café is looking at them

“Im sorry” Emily dissolved in tears and the waiter moped up the mess trying his best to not be involved.  “I will replace it or pay forrepair. There is a place around the block” She pulled out some cash and handed it to the waiter while grabbing her suitcase and purse.

Sherlock maneuvered his way through the cafe patio first, angry seething and muttering insults looking behind him every couple of steps to insult Emily to her face.  Emily ran after Sherlock crying, apologizing, and tripping over chairs.  To those looking on, it was a naive girl on the verge of doing anything to fix the situation.  In the back of her mind the chaos that was being created by people looking around, watching her trip over chairs made it even better.  Soon the direct path out of the café was blocked by a dozen metal chairs that have to be moved before the men following them could get out.

Around the corner Sherlock stopped and waited for her to catch up.  She stopped and laid down her suitcase, opened it and pulled out a light jacket, 2 handguns (one she handed to Sherlock), a very thin bullet proof vest and a zip lock bag containing 2 very small earwigs.  She snagged one of the earwigs and handed the bag to Sherlock who looked at it unsure of who he would find on the other side.

Emily placed the earwig in, took off her shirt, put on the bullet proof vest, shirt put on, jacket on, gun into the small of her back grabbed her purse and took off toward the end of the ally and around the corner leaving the suitcase behind and empty.   This process took approximately a minute and a half.  Sherlock realized she started running and quickly caught up with her still shocked to find himself holding a zip lock bag and a Glock 19.

“Harris activation, do you hear me home?” Emily said

_“Coming through loud and clear;  I didn’t expect to hear from you at least for a few more days” The familiar smooth and British voice said.  “I take it you are being shot at? Did you find him? Is he with you? If you break the equipment I gave you, you owe me!!”_

“Why do you automatically assume I am being shot at? I am not your boyfriend who seems to find a way to blow something up wherever he goes, even if it’s a domestic milk run “ Emily sarcastically replied, slightly out of breath making sure Sherlock was right behind her.

 _“He does seem to find a way to do that. I only asked because you are slightly out of breath and your gps signal appears to be moving quite fast.”_  Q responded with an air of pre-occupation. “ _I have you on CCTV, good you found him, and.. he has a gun.  Your initial plan obviously didn’t work.”_

“It worked for a bit, we had a nice flirt but he gets bored quite easily” She saw one of her tails whip around the corner. “Shit, I was hoping we lost him”

_“Take a left there, you will find yourself in an outdoor mall, try to blend in, I will find a way out and find a match to your stalkers”_

Emily and Sherlock made their way through back alleys, and though crowded areas back tracking their steps and finally ending up just around the block where the café was.  Sherlock was quiet the entire time, never discharging the weapon, and then she realized he had the earwig in, he had been listening to her and Q’s exchanged the entire time.

“Q, did you find out if my lovely stalkers are mine or Sherlock’s?”

“I am looking at airport and train footage.  They are not found on the airport footage, but two were on the train with you, red suitcase guy followed close, the other hung back on the phone and later caught up.  That’s when the other two Uglies showed up.  They followed you. Sorry” Q said.  Sherlock looked at her with harsh knowing that if she was not furious at herself and the situation she would have shrunk back.

“OK.  Tell me if they come back this way. I am going to get myself off the streets” Emily said stalking to the hotel only a block away knowing Sherlock was following her with more than a few questions.

He heard the entire exchange between Emily and Q.  Obviously she didn’t go into detail about how much she had worked with Quinton.  He was also seething at the obvious fact she brought the idiots to him.  They knew he was alive and so did the head of Moriarty’s group.   He would have a loud word in private once they got to the hotel.

He heard a lot of typing over the earwig and assumed Q was doing something clever.

“ _Em, I am blocking cell signal in the area to prevent the Uglies form calling anything in.  I was monitoring all cell phone calls while you were at the café, no erroneous messages or phone calls went through. I don’t think they had checked in with superiors, so I think we got lucky.”_

\--Well at least that’s something—Sherlock thought.

He watched Emily walk to the front desk of a small hotel, get a key and signal him to follow. 

The room was nice, Second floor, two beds, window with a balcony, bathroom with a shower.  A place to hide, that’s all it was to Sherlock, He sat on the bed, waiting, not saying a word.  Listening to exchanges made by this woman he didn’t know but did and couldn’t place and his brother that hadn’t acknowledged the earwig was active.  She wasn’t his sister.  He had met her once, coffee.  He only went to appease John.  A relative, she had to be, maybe.  John never mentions family in America though.  Maybe she was just a good friend that picked up some of his mannerisms, it happens occasionally.

“Sherlock, can I use your computer?...Sherlock?.....Um Q, hes not answering me”

Of course he could hear her; he was just not wanting to respond.  He was waiting for something.  Knew it was coming though.

“ _Sher, I know you can hear me. Im sorry.  The only reason I am helping her is because of John.  I hope you know that. .. Sher…please, I know you can hear me, please say something”_ came the voice, not as calm but tentative and a little scared.

Sherlock jumped off the bed quick as lighting, causing Emily to jump and Q make a small audible gasp. Turning in circles and looking at her with a glint of humor and dangerous knowledge in his eyes “You’re related to John! You are a Watson. HOW?” The last word was so commanding it caused Emily to stand straighter, at attention, military attention. Then he noticed her hand twitch and she looked down to the floor, almost defeated.

“I’m going to take a shower, why don’t you and Q catch up.”  Emily said quickly, and almost ran for the bathroom.

 

 

Chapter 7:

 

She could hear no talking coming from the main room. Obviously Sherlock wasn’t in the mood to talk to his brother.  For all she knew Q was talking to him and disabled her end so she could not overhear anything personal.  She didn’t care right now.  While they had been running she had received 2 texts and a phone call, all from John.  This made her worry.

_Call me –J_

_Another note came.  Call me-_ J

And the voicemail:  
 _Em, another note came while I was at the store buying milk.  Whoever it is they are watching me, and they know about you. Be careful. Call me._    
  
Emily sat there trying to decide if she should call him back with Sherlock in the next room.  She texted Q.  
  
 _John received another letter.  If you are not talking to S, I need to talk to you. Com mute S. –EH_

A few minutes past while she waited.  
  
 _‘ Emily, what did it say?”_ came Q’s voice

  
“They are still following him.  They know about me.  I thought between Sherlock and Bond, the lot was wiether deas or locked up?  What the hell is going on?” She was frustrated.

“Can you have Bond drop by to check on John? Sher will be coming home soon, but I would rather have this all solved.” 

“ _No worries sent him off after you texted.  You need to tell him, Sher is angry at you for not telling him.”_ Q was incredulous.  How did he know?

“ And for that fact How do you know? I thought I had it pretty well hidden?”  
“ _Facial recognition after you called me.  An old friend would not go as far as you have to protect someone.”_  
  


“How is our escape plan going? “Emily avoided Qs answer.

“ _Should be about an hour. The goons are still wondering around. I will alert you if something happens. Go talk to him, he refuses to acknowledge anything I have said to him…don’t worry I know he is still in the room lying on the bed”_ Q noted after he realized what Emil was thinking. That Sherlock could have snuck out the room and disappeared again.  
  
\--  
Emily came out of the bathroom and saw Sherlock was indeed laying on the bed staring at the  celling.  
“Did you have a nice chat with my brother?” He asked flatly  
“We will have an out in about an hour, till then we wait” Emily said as she sat on the edge of the bed.

There was silence.

It was defining.

“I was in Afghanistan” Emily began  “I was in a rescue mission with 4 others.  We were to pop in, extract, neutralize any immediate surrounding threat, and then get out.  It didn’t go as planned.”  
  
Sherlock made a small movement so she knew he was listening.

“We were running out of the compound with a wounded American soldier, Rollins, who had beenhostage for 3 months and been in several hostage videos.  We had a chance to get him back, so my superiors jumped at the chance.  It was a time when all you heard on the news was depressing, there was hope that good news would help assuage some tempers. 

We got out and ran to the extraction point, our ride was not there, it had gotten stuck in a Haboob 20 miles out.  Our secondary was 5 miles awayand the Brits were going to extract us.  It was a good plan till my commander got shot in the leg.  5 miles with 2 injured people and several bad guys on our heels is not ideal situation but we made it to the Brits temporary field station in an abandoned village.  
\--

“We NEED A MEDIC!” Johnson cried carrying Rollins and placing him in a nearby chair.  Franks came in supporting the Commander Kyle placing him on a table followed by Emily and Connors.  Several Brits ran in to help and confirm there was a helicopter on its way to them. Rollins began to go into shock.  

“WATSON” Johnson cried while moving Rollins to a table.  
“WHAT!?” two voices came simultaneously. One American, the other British.  They both looked at each other.  
  
“FUCK!!” Came from the female Watson.  
“WHAT the FUCK?! Emily what the bloody hell are you doing here! ” Came from the Male Brit.  
  
There was a slight pause all over the tent. General confusion on both sides.   
Connors said with faint amusement. “you, um, know each other?”

Emily turned around to glare at Connors then back to any of the British counterparts, and the one in charge Tanner. “We have incoming insurgents, arms, very pissed off. I suggest a 60 meter outlook, the heli will be here in 15 minutes, then we can all get out” the others in the tent just stared and Tanner was the first to come out of it. “Yes, of course, um, Watson will look after your men” and he walked out the tent followed by Connors, Franks, and Johnson after a glare from Emily.  
  
Emily did a quick once over on Kyle and his temporary bandaging assuring him he would be looked at once Rollins was taken care of.  Kyle looked pale but stable.  The morphine probably helped as well.  
  
She turned her attending back on Rollins and John Watson who was already doing his job and glaring at Emily every few seconds.  
“Rollins, look at me, this man here, he’s the best doctor I have ever met. He will take care of you.  Do you trust me? “She looked Rollins straight in the eye. “How do you know” asked Rollins with sheen of sweat.  
  
“He’s my Cousin.  He’s my family” Was her only response.  
  
After Rollins passed out it was Johns turn.

“Emily, I’m trying to staybloody calm, and I’m having trouble doing this.  You should be in Australia learning about the Great Barrier Reef. What the bloody hell are you doing here?”  He didn’t sound calm she noted. He sounded on the verge of killing her and then calling her mother.

She couldn’t honestly remember what happened over the course of 20 minutes.  Therewas yelling for lying to him and the entire family, yelling to get the paddles, Rollins shock was a bit much at had arrhythmia for a few minutes, yelling from outside as the insurgents had caught up with them.

Then John crumpled to the ground mid-sentence.  Something about “what if you died, no one would know what happened…”  
His shoulder was bleeding, copious amounts.  She dug for her bullet glue.  _Where the hell is the Heli?_ She thought in annoyance and a twinge of fear. 

John woke up enough to walk to the heli when it finally arrived.  They were headed to Germany.   All soldiers had some form of injury.  Turns our Emily had a piece of shrapnel in her side, she hadn’t noticed thanks to adrenaline.  
  
__  
It had been 2 weeks since that incident.  Emily finally had clearance to tell John everything.  She was recruited and then topped the field tests. Was sent on a few covert missions that needed 2 or more government agents to cooperate, she was very good at that.  And then this, it was her first real raid; she admitted it wasn’t for her.  She had asked to be transferred to covert missions or into the tech office, she had always liked their toysand then she could collaborate with a friend who was beyond brilliant. John just sat there in complete disbelief.    
“So Auntie has no idea? “was all he asked  
“No one till you.  You need to sign this” she slid a piece of paper over to him along with a pen “it’s a form to say you won’t say anything, and if you do, then your family will not go after the US government for your disappearance. Or something like that” she tried to add humor.  John had taken it very badly.  It also didn’t help that the shoulder wound had ended his military carrier.  It was her fault; she needed to find a way to make up for it.  
“If you ever need anything John, here is my personal number.  This will send you directly to me, no roundabout that I’m somewhere with no signal.  I don’t care if you need to talk or it’s the end of the world or is 3 in the morning. Please call me. Your family and now that you know my secret…well its only fair that you hold it over me” she winked, and he laughed, be it a small one.

He left for home 4 days later.  She had talked to him a little since then.  Found out about him moving in with a man named Sherlock, she did a background check on him; he seemed fine, a bit insane, but fine.  She checked his blog, this were going so well.  She even got the impression there was something else in the underline when John wrote about this man and their day to day exploits through London.  Then the phone call, then plead for help, then the anger, fear, hopelessness.  She was there. 

\---  
After the kidnapping by Mr. Mycroft she was annoyed, but she put those feelings aside to focus on John.  There was a store around the corner. She popped in and got a carton of milk, and sandwich supplies. Knocked on 221B where a lovely older woman answered the door, looked at her and pointed up the stairs.  She was sure this was abnormal; she looked like the type of woman who enjoyed talking and gossiping.  Sherlock’s death hit her hard as well. She made a note to invite her up for tea once she checked on the state of John, her Family.   
  
She wasn’t surprised to find him in a winged chair with legged propped up. he was practically trying to curl himself into the chair.  She was warned.  It was Sherlock’s chair.  He was zoned out, thinking. Emily had put away the milk and makings before John looked up startled to find another living person in the same room as him.

“Emily, oh, I’m sorry I didn’t hear you come in. Um, let me make you a cup of tea..i don’t have milk though” he looked sad by this thought. He got up and put the kettle on.  
“No worries cuz, I got you covered.” She went to the fridge and grabbed it.

Emily hugged him, asked him how he was.  They sat in the living room for a few hours talking and drinking tea before there was a slight beeping and Emily stood up and declared it was time for dinner. 

John scoffed “I’m not hungry”.  
“Fine but I’m starving, my sugar is low as well, and you’re coming with me.”

She practically dressed him and dragged him out of the house.  
This happened over the next few days.  She would state it was time for food, he would say he wasn’t hungry; she made him go with her.   What John didn’t know was She dragged him out so Q would install some cameras so she could watch him while gone. 

The day she decided to leave to track some leads, John was looking better.  Mrs. Hudson had promised to make sure he ate.  It was only on the train to Paris did she find one small line of information she missed the first time.  Small amounts of money were missing from Sherlock’s bank account. They were labeled Bank Charges code #18453 in the amount of €100 every 2 weeks.  She had assumed it was some form of automatic bill payment that was never turned off.  It was initiated from Bruges Belgium, this was new and the only good lead she had, so 15 minutes was spent in Paris and was back on a train following the breadcrumbs.  
  
\-----  
“I called Q on the train; it took him about an hour to find you. And 20 minutes after that for Mycroft to call me and yell at me for interfering.”  
  
She hadn’t intended on telling him about the state of John when she got to the flat, but she needed to tell him, she needed Sherlock to know what this was doing to the only person he had chosen to love.

Sherlock was still lying on the bed. “Why did you find me?  You obviously were going to ‘take down the network’ but then you found something I missed.  What was your plan then?”  
  
“To stop Moran. To stop the notes. To take you home. To make John smile again.”  
  
  
\------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 8:

 

\----

Emily’s phone began to ring.

“Blocked number…Q? Can you trace this; no one should have it besides john”

 _“Its Mycroft_ ” Qs response sounded strained and curious

“Why would He be calling me…unless”

“Mr. Holmes, I’m assuming you are not calling just to chat, what happened to John?” She said without missing a beat.  He would never admit itbut her stomach was dropping as she waited for his response.

_“John has been shot.  Moran.  He is still in London, he cannot escape. Q I assume you are listing in? I believe he Moran was in a 2 block vicinity of 221B. Track him.”_

Emily could only hear typing over her comm system, she waited, and she didn’t want to ask.  The only reason this man would call her is if something horrible had happened.  She was just waiting for the other foot to drop, so to speak.

_“Emily, I’m sorry_ ”….silence

Silence

_“Where is Sherlock?”_

Emily was looking straight into Sherlock’s eyes, he could read what she was feeling

“He is looking at me, he is pale, and I think he has gone into shock” she whispered

\--

He could read it on her face.  He didn’t need her to say a thing. 

His john was gone

Taken

Taken from him

He fell to protect his John, and now Moran was playing with him. To bring him out into the open.  He must still be in London he thought.

Gone

He couldn’t move

He couldn’t breathe

He was moving, why he was moving? Emily was dragging him. He was in a cab.  He didn’t care.  His reason to fight was gone.

Gone

\---

“Q, Mycroft, I don’t know what to do, he isn’t moving.  Get me a plane NOW. We are going to London. Q keep an eye on Moran, make sure he can’t leave.

 _“You have a private plane at the airfield in 15 min.”_ was Qs only response.

Emily couldn’t break down, not yet. They were out of the hotel and in a cab in less than 2 minutes. On their way to the airport.

She won’t break down.

John…

He was so kind and caring and better than her in every way. If she want prepared for Sherlock’s callousness she would have shot him at the café.

The ride was quite.

Sherlock was gone, looking out the window but not seeing anything, she knew he was lost in the memory of John.

Moran had found the perfect way to get Sherlock where he wanted him. It’s going to work. She didn’t care. She wanted to hurt this man Moran for hurting her family, for hurting her “new” family that she was slowly trusting.

15 min later they were on a tarmac waiting for the plane to lower the stares. She didn’t know if Sherlock was paying any attentionbut he allowed her to guide him onto the plane, into a seat, and he accepted water without really focusing on anything.

This was bad, Sherlock has checked out from reality…

Emily went to the toilet for some privacy

“Q, do you have a plan? Because if you don’t I will just start shooting at things till Moran shows up so please tell me you have a plan.”

_ “I have a plan.  006 is on his way back from Germanyand Bond is in the armory clearing the shelves.  M will not be happy later when he finds out, but neither of us care at the moment.”   _

_“Em, how is he?”_ came Qs tentative voice, scared to ask.

“He’s gone, he’s in memory. I can’t jar him out of it till he is ready Q”

“Keep me updated on this frequency only.  I am going silent to talk to Sherlock, try to bring him back before we land”  Emily left the loo and headed to the seat that was occupied by the shell of the great Sherlock Holmes.

“Sherlock, I need you to snap out of it, I need to talk to you, please” it as quiet for 20 min before Sherlock registered anything, his eyes blinked and looked surprised to find himself on a plane

Sherlock just looked around, then at Emily, blank, a mask of pain. She couldn’t understand.

Quietly it started.

“You lead them here, you are the reason John is dead” quiet almost like he was testing how it sounded on his lips

“YOU LEAD THEM HERE. YOU ARE THE REASON JOHN IS DEAD!” Sherlock screamed.  Standing up to his full height and a crazed look in his eyes.  She was caught off guard and moved as far as the small plane would allow, which for her comfort level was not very far.  Her anger was rising as well as Sherlock blamed her for John’s end.  “If you hadn’t been so stubborn to find me, they would not…John would be safe till I was finished.” Sherlock took a breath.  Emily found her moment to chip in.

“He knew about you for over 2 weeks.  He knew you were alive for 2 FUCKING WEEKS!.  He’s been watching you.  I DID NOT LEAD THEM HERE.  I just forced his hand. “This stopped Sherlock in his tracks.  This was something he couldn’t comprehend.

“What do you mean he knew?  How do you know?” he said still with some harshness in his voice.

“Q and the bank account isn’t the complete reason I found you, why do you think I was headed to Paris first?” came the quiet response.  Emily was timid about this answer afraid of what would happen “I found you because I wasdeep cover for Moran up until the day he found you. I came out of my assignment the day John called me. “

“You knew where he was?” seething hiss came out of the man standing in front of her.

“No, I didn’t, I was just in contact with his group, trying to identify members” replied Emily.

“Did Q know that John had been in danger, and didn’t tell me?” Sherlock directed the question at Emily, but was really directing it to the quiet man over the com systems.

 

“Sherlock, Moran is still in London, we know this. Q has him stuck in the city. He has a plan; I think…Bond and Trevelyan are going to help us hunt him.  Please Sherlock register what I am saying.  Do not go back into the darkness I need you.” This took everything she had not to break down herself. She wanted to cry, to mourn, to hit something, to blow something up...all that will come.

The anger and adrenalin were rapidly flowing out of Sherlock, he hunched ad sat back down. 

“Please stay together just for a little bit. I need you.  After we are done…well…I don’t know, but then you can do what you are thinking.  I know that look Sherlock…let me guess sleeping pills and cut wrists at 2am when no one will think to check on you?

His eyes snapped up, it wasshock that he had on his face “how. How did..”

“How did I know?  Because that’s what I would do. To be honest I’m surprised John hadn’t done it yet, but then again he would probably shoot himself.  But, then again I think he was always more stable than me…please finish this, then …it will be over” she didn’t want to say she would let him; she didn’t want to tell himtime would heal all wounds. This man in front of her valued truth.  Deception would make him hide from her and give her a lie, when all she wanted is from him to see that she was dying insidebut managed to stay together because of rage and the need for vengeance.

Sherlock just nodded.  They sat in silence till they landed.  They both were thinking the same thing. Revenge, justice, murder. Moran would die this day. He would not get out of London alive.  If they had to take out half of London to do it, he could not hide.

\--

As the landed she turned the headsets back on and told Q that Sherlock was in some form of consciousness.

2 black cars were waiting when they landed. Q and Bond came out of one and, who she assumed was 006, Alec Trevelyan and a driver from the other. 

Sherlock just stood to the side while Emily was introduced to 006. There were no “pleasantries” this was a mission, even if it wasn’t sanctioned.

Another black car shows upand they all turned.  A woman stepped out... Bond, Q, and Sherlock groaned and the woman sidled up to the group.

“Mr. Holmes would like to speak with you Ms. Harris” Emily just looked, not moving. “please.” she said with a serious look upon her face.

Emily moved toward the carand the woman stayed, Emily assumed to make sure the others didn’t interrupt this little meeting.

“Mr. Holmes, I’m sorry but I am a little busy. If you have new Intel I ask if you would direct it towards Q.  If not then I truly must be going” she smiles politely but with an edge.

Mycroft Holmes, the British Government, handed Emily a folder.

“This in front of you is a directive stating that this mission is a sanctioned action to apprehend a known terrorist on European soil.  That one Emily Harris aka Emily Watson is on loan to MI-6 for the duration of this mission. And if any…property damage is done She has been sanction by MI-6.  Meaning Miss Harris if you shoot Moran or blow up a building, this is official business to protect Queen and Country, as well as our thriving partners including the Unites States.”

Emily just looked at the folder in shock. She was wondering how she would be able to do anything on foreign soil without eventually being arrested.

“I thought MI-6 could not operate missions in county, this was MI-5’s area”

“It usually is MI-5, but given the circumstances they have agreed that Moran is too dangerousand our Double 0 program is too skilled not to be used. They have stepped aside”

“How Kind, I’m sure you had some influence, since you do occupy a “minor” position.”

“Yes, well…another thing” he handed her another folder. This time it looked medical in nature”

Emily froze, seeing the name on the side Watson, John H.

“Please I am not in the mood to look at my cousins medical or autopsy files. I will deal with this all once …” her voice faulted “once …” she didn’t finish.

Mycroft gestured for her to look.

Emily opened the file and began to cry.

\--

Emily had been in Mycroft’s car for far too long, Sherlock could tell everyone was nervous. Finallyshe emerged. She looked annoyed and sad and angry and...Something. No, he knows it was grief. She had cried in the car.

_-Bloody Mycroft, she was doing so much better than him in keeping it together, he broke her-_

Sherlock took to heart what she said on the plane. To pull it together, just long enough till it was over, than…than the other thing. He decided in the plane that over 3 years he was selfish for not telling John that he was alive, somehow he could have found a way not to tip off Moran, and he was a genius after all. It had only been a few hours...are this what John felt? If it was…God how had John survived for so long? He wondered mildly if there were sleeping pills in 221B or if he should go to a pharmacy first. Then he could lay in Johns bed one last time… _no snap out of it_ ”..later, after. After. Then it can stop.

Sherlock watched Mycroft and his assistant leave.

\--

“This is officially a sanctioned mission.  Mycroft called M. he didn’t even bat an eye apparently. Just said ok” Emily informed the others

“Well, then that will make this entire thing much easier, what about you? Are you official or are am I still performing treason for handing you a few weapons?”  James Bond said, there was no playfulness like their first mission,  all business and some sadness behind those blue eyes.

“I’m on loan to MI-6” straight and to the point, all nodded.

“James, Alec come show me what you have” Emily said as she pulled the two double 0’s away to leave Q and Sherlock alone...either to talk or stare into nothingness in silence.

\--

Emily and the 2 double 0’s went to the truck Bondand Q came in. it was stocked with any type of weapon she would want.

“We need a plan. Do either of you have one?” Alec said

“Do you think he can hear us?” Emily asked the 2 men in front of her. Alec looked confused.

“No, he’s 500 meters to the west looking throughsniper scoop. He cannot read lips. We can talk” wasbond response. He knew they were followed and looked at Emily, surprised she knew too. Alec caught on half way through.

“Ok, then plan? “ Emily lifted her hand subtly and turned on her comm to Q and Sherlock so they could talk.

“Do not react. We have a tail, he is watching us. Keep doing what you are doing.”

Q continued to “comfort” his brother, Sherlock looked off into space. James was “showing” her the weapons in the trunkand Alec was watching and sometimes picking guns up and showing off certain aspects.

Alec talked first “I have an idea but I don’t know if Sherlock would like it”

 _“What is it?”_ was Sherlock’s response

“St Barts; The basement or morgue area, and the 2 floors about that, no windows. He would have to go in to find you. If his psych profile means anything, that place will hold meaning” his voice trailed then picked up “it’s practically a perfect kill box. We can trap him there. I don’t think he would be able to resist”

Everyone was silent.

 _“Sherlock?”_ Q said in a whisper.

“I think that’s the best idea we have” said Bond “but it will depend on Sherlock”

Silence

Emily couldn’t stand it, they needed to move.

“Sherlock listen to me. Alec is right; Moran will not be able to resist it. It’s where Jim Moriarty died. He would find it poetic.  He targeted John because he knew you would come home if something happened to him.  Where would be the first place you went? To where John was. This is his trap for you. He wants revenge. Let’s turn the tables. The longer Moran thinks John is dead the more he will obsess over making you suffer. He will want to confront you and taunt you and throw it in your face”

Silence

…..

 _“thinks”_ came the whisper

….

 _“you said “thinks””._ Again a whisper. Sherlock was stone still and pale.

….

Emily looked down; there were three sets of eyes on her. Boring into her soul.

“yes I know what I said.” Emily responded quietly, barely audible

_Mycroft was urging her to read the file he handed her_

_The report in front of her. The medical file for Watson, John H._

_ Left- shoulder gunshot wound. Bullet shattered oncollar bone. Patent endured 4 hour surgery. Current status: coma in intensive care. Prognosis: fair _

_She cried_

\--

 “yes I know what I said.” Emily said as 3 pairs of eyes were on her.  Q looked back at Sherlock.

She looked over from the 2 most dangerous men standing next to her. “Mycroft” said James.

“He is at St. Mary’s. He dies for 4 minutes on the way to the hospital, that’s when Mycroft called. He didn’t know anything else. He just...didn’t correct the information, until we landed and knew his prognosis. “She said in a small voice, pleading to be forgiven. “Moran shot him and missed the heart by millimeters. The bullet shattered on the collar bone. Surgery took 4 hours to remove it. He is stable. But in 5 minutes the news will report that John H. Watson, a dignified veteran was attacked outside his flat and has died from his injuries at St. Bartholomew’s hospital.  DI Greg Lestrade and Mrs. Hudson are currently at St Mary’s under the protection of MI-5, Mycroft’s doing. “She couldn’t talk anymore. She needed to be forgiven for not telling Sherlock immediately.

Bond looked at her “ok, we have a plan. St. Bart’s. Q can you call Molly and have her clear the bottom 3 floors?  You will go home, you can direct us from there, drop Sherlock off at St. Bart’s, and Molly can meet him outside.  We 3 will go in the direction Moran wants us to go, which is the opposite direction, and come around the back.  I’m sure he is solely focused on Sherlock at the moment so it shouldn’t be very hard to get in through the back door.  When this is over we will meet at St. Mary’s”

Emily nodded.

Alec nodded.

Bond called Q and Sherlock over as if they had not been talking together in the first place; they had to have the appearance of a broken system. Q would go home because of the long day and Sherlock would go greave over his friend and the man he loved, while the others would go hunting.

The MI-6 man who brought Alec was waiting for Q and Sherlock to climb in. Q got in the car. Sherlock gave a look to Emily that chilled her.  The look of emptiness. Like he didn’t hear a word she had told him, that John was alive. Was he still lost in his memories? Emily watched them drive away not sure what to do.

After everyone was safe and secure in the designated cars. Q’s voice came over the comms.

_“Connection secure. Private”_

_“Thinks”_ whispered into the  coms. _“Stable”_ said with the hint of a smile.

She was relived he knew, but she also knew Sherlock may never forgive her for not telling him right away.

\--

Q was dropped off first at his and Bonds flat.  As much as he enjoyed Q branch, at home he felt more in control.  He could tap into MI-6 and stay in his pajama bottoms. But today was different. Today this was private, even if it was sanctioned.

\--

Sherlock met Molly at the side door that went straight to the morgue.  To anyone watching, Sherlock broke down in a rare show of emotion as soon as Molly gave him a hug.  He was weak, and un-protected and not mindful of his surroundings.

This is what Moran saw.  He knows he will get what he wanted. Revenge for the man he loved.  He shattered Sherlock’s World, now he is suffering, he will suffer more.

15 min ago he received a news updated about a war veteran who died after an attack outside his home. He smiled.   Remembering lining up the shot to kill the man Sherlock had “fallen” for both emotionally and literally. He would pay. Pulling the trigger, watching the blood spray across the door, the man crumpling onto the front steps. Then the screams and the ambulance.  Moran left to the airport. He waited where private planes came in and was not disappointed to see the great Sherlock Holmes looking lost.  It was almost time. Now at the morgue, it was the perfect spot. Poetic actually. Sherlock would die in the place he should have looking down at his dead lover in a body bag. Moran smiled sadly at the roof and slipped quietly into the same back door that was used by the dead detective.

\--

Sherlock entered the morgue. The two floors above it had been cleared. Molly said she convinced them there was an unknown mold on one of the bodies and just to be safe they needed to evacuate for the day. If the test came back positive she would call the hazardous team.  Right now it was just a precaution. No one questioned it. They just left. She couldn’t believe it.

“Everyone is clear. Is there anything else you need me to do?” Molly said over the phone to Q. 

_“No, thank you, how is Sherlock has he said anything?”_

“He just cried, I am not sure how much of it was an act though. He did tell me to leave as soon as he got settled”

“Good, take his advice, not many people get that side of Sherlock, and he does trust you. Please go, and be safe.”

“Bye” Molly hung up, gave Sherlock a hug and walked out the doors to the stairs to go up to the chapel to wait.

\--

Now Sherlock was alone in the dark sitting next to a table with a body bag approximately the size of john Watson. He knew John was not in there, but just imagining it brought tears to his eyes.

“I should have told you how much I loved you.”

No response, not that he expected any

“I should have come home sooner”

No response

“I miss you so much”

“You will be with him again very soon” came an unknown voice

Sherlock stayed seated, didn’t look up. He knew it was Moran. He knew he was coming due to the plan, but even if there was no plan, he would do the same thing. No reaction. He was tiered. He just wanted to sleep. He just wanted to be held by a strong man who wore ugly jumpers.

“You don’t seem surprised I’m here”

No response

“I have known you were alive for 3 weeks. I was going to shoot you in Belgium but then I had a better plan to make you hurt.  Is it working?  Of course it is. You are sitting in a dark morgue talking to a body.”

“Just shoot me, I’m tired and I don’t want to hear you talk anymore” came a morose response of a man broken.

“No, I will not shoot you, I want you to understand what pain I have been though”

Moran came to the table and looked down at Sherlock who sat there broken. He loved it.  Sherlock looked at the floor, waiting for him to come closer. Where was his backup?

As the though a voice came over the coms _“we just pulled in, Q how is everything. We are coming into the building now”_ Bond, they were coming.

Sherlock pulled his gun on Moran.  He did not seem surprised; in fact he had also pulled his gun,

2 men holding sidearm to the others head. Who would blink first?

“Moran you know that you will not get out of here alive, and once you are gone the entire network is gone.” Came Sherlock’s voice, calm and confidant.

“It stopped being about keeping Jims network alive and more about killing you, making you suffer since I realized you were still alive.”

“I hope you think it was worth it” Sherlock didn’t mention what ‘it’ was but Moran smiled and pulled the trigger.

\--

“Why is he not awake yet?” Sherlock said as he sat back down into the chair that is rarely vacated by the detective. His shoulder in a sling. Sherlock was tackled by Alec in the spilt second Moran pulled his trigger.

Sherlock had pulled his trigger as well but as he fell the aim went sideways. Bond and Emily shot Moran till their clips were empty, than Sherlock made sure that he could not come back, like some horror move John had once made him watch “always shoot the head, you know that the serial killer is dead, if not the always comeback for the sequel.”

“The doctors said that it takes time. But I have an idea...” Emily trailed off

What?”

“Well I’m afraid he may not want to come back. Right now he is probably lost in memories and chooses to say there.” Emily pulled out a well-worn book “here. Read this to him. Maybe he will hear you voice,  and it will be a beacon for him”

Sherlock looked down, it was a book of poems by Emerson. Sherlock snorted and scoffed.

“just try it, how could it hurt?”

Sherlock looked back down and opened the book, he began to read to the man lying in a coma, hooked tomachine that beeped and buzzed.

\--

Emily had been staying at 221B until she could make other arrangements. Mrs. Hudson slapped Sherlock when they showed up, and Lestrade punched him, then hugged him. Things could have gone worse. Now for Johns response. That could be Sherlock’s undoing.

Alec had hung around and taken Emily on some site seeing double 0 style, which at times were terrifying. She didn’t know it was possible to speed through London traffic. Alec even managed to take her on a date.

\--

 _“ …Leave all for love;—_  
Yet, hear me, yet,  
One word more thy heart behoved,  
One pulse more of firm endeavor,  
Keep thee to-day,  
To-morrow, for ever,  
Free as an Arab  
Of thy beloved.  
Cling with life to the maid;  
But when the surprise,….”

“I love your voice” came a whisper

Sherlock looked up, with relief and a smile

“Well I think I have almost lost it reading this to you.”

“I like Emerson”

“I know”

“I’m glad you’re here, thank you”

Sherlock smiled.  He was not expecting happiness and smiling. He was expecting yelling and screaming.

They talked about nothing and everything that didn’t matter for an hour until Emily showed up to check on him.

\--

“Your awake, oh my gosh,” Emily ran over and gave John a hug.

John flinched, his shoulder hurt

“Sorry, are you ok?”

“Yah, I’m just not sure what’s going on.”

“Moran shot you for revenge, but we can talk about all that later, you have been in a coma for 3 weeks I was starting to worry”

“Moran is dead?”

“Yes, he’s dead, we can all breathe”

“Thank you Emily I knew you would be able to help. I just wish...” he trailed off.

“Well I’m glad you finally woke up.” Emily looked over at Sherlock who had been uncharacteristically quiet. “I told you Emerson would help” she smiled

Sherlock smiled

And John’s heartbeat, pulse and breathing began to set off alarm bells

“John calm down, what’s wrong?  Breath.”

Doctors and nurses came running in. assessing and injecting him with something that would calm him down/

“John, breathe its ok, what’s wrong”

“You…you can see him?” was all he said before succumbing into darkness.

\--

The next morning was tricky.  Sherlock was there reading Emerson when John woke up. John looked at him, looked at Emily as asked “he’s’ here? He’s not dead?” Emily nodded. John then exploded. Yelling and screaming ensued and per Emily’s instructions, the staff at St. Mary’s did not interfere unless his readings were extremely dangerous.

Emily slipped out and met Q and Moneypenny who was on lunch break in the cafeteria.

“So how did it go?” asked Moneypenny.

“As well as you can guess. If Sherlock does not have a black eye when I go back up, I will be surprised. I think the staff may stop John before he strangles Sherlock, but I’m only guessing. “Emily shrugged.

Q looked amused.

And hour later the 3 of them went back to Johns room to assess the damage. What they saw made Q let out a barking laugh.

Sherlock with an icepack over an eye snuggling in John’s bed, with John running his fingers though Sherlock’s hair. John had been crying, so had Sherlock. The staff was going around their business, so Emily guessed things were not too violent.  Except the TV now had a remote coming out if it, that can be replaced. Emily shook her head and entered the room

“You could have told me Em” John said with a frown.

“actually I couldn’t, Moran was monitoring your communications, and I only found him a few hours before Moran shot you, so I didn’t have time for a secure connection” supplied Emily.

“Thank you for bringing him home” John smiled wistfully.  Sherlock looked to blissed out to care about anything

“Well, the doctors say you need to stay here for a few more days then you can go home…on a side note I need to find a flat now.” Emily turned to Moneypenny “any place I can start looking?”

“I can send you a list, Q?” replied Moneypenny. And Q nodded.

“What do you mean you need to find a flat? You’re staying on London?”

“MI-6 has somewhat adopted me.  I was loaned over to help with the Moran situation and it kinda snowballed from there.  I have become the somewhat liaison for both groups. So I’m in need of a place to stay while I’m here. I am keeping my apartment in Washington. But I suspect there may be some back and forth. “Emily smiled “it’s complicated. Tell you what, when you get released and settled back in ..say 48hours..we will ALL go out to dinner and have a nice chat”

John only nodded.  He was looking very tired. The fight with Sherlock had drained him.

“Go to sleep. I will be back later to check on you” Emily said and kidded John’s forehead.

“And Sherlock” a grunt in response “I will be sending food over, eat it. I will bring a change of clothed in the morning. And don’t mess this up. He loves you.” She kissed Sherlock on his head too. He just grunted in response.

“Come on you two I need a good place for dinner” Emily said as Q and Moneypenny followed. Both with smiles.

\--

Sherlock woke with a start. No sure where he was. There was beingand he was warm.  Someone’s hand was in his.

“John?”

“Yes?”

“I’m sorry” Sherlock said in a whisper

John was looking out the window, it was raining and dark.

He looked down and smiled “I missed you too much to be angry right now. I thought you were gone. Did you know next week would have been 3 years?”

Sherlock nodded. “I tried to come home sooner”

“I had a plan on the anniversary, but I didn’t know if I could do it… “ John was quiet for a beat “ I didn’t want Mrs. Hudson to be the one to find me. “ he went quiet

“John I understand. When I thought you were gone. I had come up with a plan. I didn’t want to live in the world without you in it. If you were gone, then who would miss someone who was already dead? Emily knewand I think she would have let me. She would have cleaned it up. I don’t know why…but…”

John interrupted

“Because I would have done the same for her.  When…well let’s just say, we made a deal, if it got too much I would clean up and fix it.  The fact she would do it for you means she trusts you”

Sherlock looked shocked at this revelation.  Would his family had done that for him? He didn’t know, but Q might, not Mycroft.

“Im glad you didn’t. I love you and never want to be without you. The criminal group is gone. I’m home. Can we be ok?”

It was not a question, it was a plea. Could Sherlock come home? Come home to John.

John hugged him. “You are home. Here in my arms, your home”

Sherlock felt himself begin to cry. How could this man, John Hamish Watson bring this out in him? Was he weaker for feeling this way? No. he was stronger because if he didn’t care he would have died long ago. And John made him better. Always better.

“I never want to let you go again…can I marry you? Sherlock was soft and cautious. Nothing like how he was normally.

John sat in the darkness looking at the man he was holding. On the verge of being broken if he was rejected.  John will deal with the fact he was lied to, but tonight all he felt happiness, joy, peace….and he knew this man could make him feel that all the time, even if he was a git and never bought milk.

“Yes, yes Sherlock Holmes I never want you to go away from me again. Yes I will marry you.”

\--

 

What Sherlock was reading to John-

**Give All To Love**

Give all to love;  
Obey thy heart;  
Friends, kindred, days,  
Estate, good fame,  
Plans, credit, and the muse;  
Nothing refuse.  
  
'Tis a brave master,  
Let it have scope,  
Follow it utterly,  
Hope beyond hope;  
High and more high,  
It dives into noon,  
With wing unspent,  
Untold intent;  
But 'tis a god,  
Knows its own path,  
And the outlets of the sky.  
'Tis not for the mean,  
It requireth courage stout,  
Souls above doubt,  
Valor unbending;  
Such 'twill reward,  
They shall return  
More than they were,  
And ever ascending.  
  
Leave all for love;—  
Yet, hear me, yet,  
One word more thy heart behoved,  
One pulse more of firm endeavor,  
Keep thee to-day,  
To-morrow, for ever,  
Free as an Arab  
Of thy beloved.  
Cling with life to the maid;  
But when the surprise,  
Vague shadow of surmise,  
Flits across her bosom young  
Of a joy apart from thee,  
Free be she, fancy-free,  
Do not thou detain a hem,  
Nor the palest rose she flung  
From her summer diadem.  
  
Though thou loved her as thyself,  
As a self of purer clay,  
Tho' her parting dims the day,  
Stealing grace from all alive,  
Heartily know,  
When half-gods go,  
The gods arrive.

 

\--Ralph Waldo Emerson

 


End file.
